If You Don't Believe In Prayer, Talk To Me
{I am trying out a new look on the blog. Let me know what you think. It might be a little much.}
Yesterday, Granny informed me she was going to make this announcement during church this morning - "If you don't believe in prayer, ask Katie Bradshaw. We have prayed her through law school, and now through passing the bar." Lucky for me, I wasn't there. You see, my grandmother just says whatever she thinks in church, and I mean whatever. I told her it might not be a good idea to stand up and tell everyone, but she said that she prayed enough for me that she can now brag all she wants to. Touche. (the other French word I remember.)
After thinking about it, she does have a point, "prayer did get me through it." Honestly, I do not see how anyone that takes a test like that, can feel anything more than THANKFUL if they pass. Everyone in that room is smart, smart enough to finish law school. But something about the atmosphere just makes the test really stressful. Therefore, "thankful" is absolutely the only word that comes to mind upon passing. I have been debating whether or not to tell you why this test became extra stressful for me. After some deliberation, including writing and deleting a couple of posts, I have finally decided just to tell you.
The first day of the bar I got there an hour early. After waiting for thirty minutes, they finally let us in, we found our assigned seats and registered. The test givers were very adamant that if you arrived late, you would not be allowed to take the test. Everyone was really early, except for the third person assigned to my table. By nine o'clock the person was still not even there. I was worried, but I kept thinking, it is not me.
Then the test givers realized that all the clocks were wrong, so they spent twenty minutes setting all the clocks to the same time. At this point the third person at our table, was still not even there! We started the test and then about five to ten minutes later the woman arrived and they let her begin. I didn't care that they let her take it, but it was very distracting. I was extremely annoyed. All I could do was pray for a) patience and b) to stay focused. After the lunch break the woman did apologize. However, I was still kind of annoyed.
After lunch the second day she begins making conversation with me. Come to find out, we had very very similar names. I am not going to tell you her name, but it was similar. Anyway, we kind of chatted. Then the other guy at our table arrives and she asks him where he went to law school and when he graduated. He asked her the same and she told us she graduated several years ago. So he says, "have you been practicing law in another state?" And she says "nope, I have failed this darn thing eleven times."
I began hyperventilating. She kept talking and I kept trying to tune her out. All that was running through my head was "11, eleven, ELEVEN times!" I couldn't even think of any good in this information at this point. We immediately began the afternoon portion of the exam. I started praying for me, for her, for me to focus on the exam, then for her again, and then for me to stay focused. This continued for a good twenty minutes. I couldn't breathe....I kept trying to find air to suck in...I was freaking out....eleven times folks. Then I started thinking what if they get us confused? Which was mean, but I really did think that.
That night I had to do some major chilling out in order to let it go. I even prayed for her, genuinely. I am still praying for her, particularly that her life will be blessed. Honestly, she has real persistency, or as my grandmother would say "stickability." But the experience shook me. The next day she brought a bunch of pencils and offered them to us if ours broke. Let me tell you, I was hoping mine didn't break.
Let me say, I am not making fun of her. And I could have chosen not to tell you this story. But for honesty sake, this is what happened, and this was my reaction. The testing situation was a high pressure environment. Apparently, there were people crying each day. I never saw anyone cry, but we all wanted to cry the last day. Trust me this has showed me that I will never look down on anyone who didn't pass.
The point I am trying to make is, thankfulness abounds me at this moment. The truth is, prayer was exactly what kept me sane and focused. Without the ability to focus I would have never made it through that. God is good folks. And I guess Granny is right, if you don't believe in prayer, talk to me.
Yesterday, Granny informed me she was going to make this announcement during church this morning - "If you don't believe in prayer, ask Katie Bradshaw. We have prayed her through law school, and now through passing the bar." Lucky for me, I wasn't there. You see, my grandmother just says whatever she thinks in church, and I mean whatever. I told her it might not be a good idea to stand up and tell everyone, but she said that she prayed enough for me that she can now brag all she wants to. Touche. (the other French word I remember.)
After thinking about it, she does have a point, "prayer did get me through it." Honestly, I do not see how anyone that takes a test like that, can feel anything more than THANKFUL if they pass. Everyone in that room is smart, smart enough to finish law school. But something about the atmosphere just makes the test really stressful. Therefore, "thankful" is absolutely the only word that comes to mind upon passing. I have been debating whether or not to tell you why this test became extra stressful for me. After some deliberation, including writing and deleting a couple of posts, I have finally decided just to tell you.
The first day of the bar I got there an hour early. After waiting for thirty minutes, they finally let us in, we found our assigned seats and registered. The test givers were very adamant that if you arrived late, you would not be allowed to take the test. Everyone was really early, except for the third person assigned to my table. By nine o'clock the person was still not even there. I was worried, but I kept thinking, it is not me.
Then the test givers realized that all the clocks were wrong, so they spent twenty minutes setting all the clocks to the same time. At this point the third person at our table, was still not even there! We started the test and then about five to ten minutes later the woman arrived and they let her begin. I didn't care that they let her take it, but it was very distracting. I was extremely annoyed. All I could do was pray for a) patience and b) to stay focused. After the lunch break the woman did apologize. However, I was still kind of annoyed.
After lunch the second day she begins making conversation with me. Come to find out, we had very very similar names. I am not going to tell you her name, but it was similar. Anyway, we kind of chatted. Then the other guy at our table arrives and she asks him where he went to law school and when he graduated. He asked her the same and she told us she graduated several years ago. So he says, "have you been practicing law in another state?" And she says "nope, I have failed this darn thing eleven times."
I began hyperventilating. She kept talking and I kept trying to tune her out. All that was running through my head was "11, eleven, ELEVEN times!" I couldn't even think of any good in this information at this point. We immediately began the afternoon portion of the exam. I started praying for me, for her, for me to focus on the exam, then for her again, and then for me to stay focused. This continued for a good twenty minutes. I couldn't breathe....I kept trying to find air to suck in...I was freaking out....eleven times folks. Then I started thinking what if they get us confused? Which was mean, but I really did think that.
That night I had to do some major chilling out in order to let it go. I even prayed for her, genuinely. I am still praying for her, particularly that her life will be blessed. Honestly, she has real persistency, or as my grandmother would say "stickability." But the experience shook me. The next day she brought a bunch of pencils and offered them to us if ours broke. Let me tell you, I was hoping mine didn't break.
Let me say, I am not making fun of her. And I could have chosen not to tell you this story. But for honesty sake, this is what happened, and this was my reaction. The testing situation was a high pressure environment. Apparently, there were people crying each day. I never saw anyone cry, but we all wanted to cry the last day. Trust me this has showed me that I will never look down on anyone who didn't pass.
The point I am trying to make is, thankfulness abounds me at this moment. The truth is, prayer was exactly what kept me sane and focused. Without the ability to focus I would have never made it through that. God is good folks. And I guess Granny is right, if you don't believe in prayer, talk to me.
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