Massages and Bowling
Now I realize massages and bowling wouldn't normally seem like two things to discuss in the same blog, but these are two things that have been on my mind lately. Let me start first with massages. The Alluvian is a very nice hotel located in Greenwood, Mississippi. I believe that Viking owns the hotel, and you can buy Viking products somewhere in the area. In fact they have a cooking class that would be awesome to attend if anyone is interested. But most people go to the Alluvian for the Spa. My friends have planned a trip to the Alluvian for Valentine's Day Weekend, which will include doing a spa day etc. Unfortunately I will not be able to go because I will be getting ready to leave for a competition in New York the next week. Now please do not think that what I am about to say is due to me being bitter about the fact I cannot go, I have had these thoughts for a long time.
I DO NOT like massages. Seriously, I read this Maxine cartoon once that summed it up "I would like massages if some stranger wasn't touching me the entire time." You are naked, nekked, exposed, and a stranger is touching you. Have you thought about it like that? I don't like for people I do not know to touch me in the first place, but to rub on me while I am under a blanket and naked? Really, how is this relaxing? And yes, I have had a massage, a very nice one at that. The lady was soo nice and completely professional, but it was weird nonetheless. Now, I know that a couple of people reading this blog are actually massage therapists. I apologize, but trust me my mother keeps the industry in business. And I know some of you are thinking,go see someone that you know personally, well come on thats kind a awkward as well. Hi, how are you today, so nice to see you again, now get naked and let me rub on you. No, thanks.
So the other thing that has been bugging me this week is a conversation I had with a friend about bowling. Last week was our law school bowling tournament. All law school tournaments, competitions etc., are taken very seriously. Very seriously. Just look at my picture on this blog, a group of us were the cast of the Price's Right for the Halloween Competition. I had my hair done at J.C. Penney's, one guy put on 22 coats of self tanner. Get what I am saying, these are competitive people here in lawyer school.
(Disclaimer - the rest of this blog is not meant to offend anyone. I personally believe God has a wonderful sense of humor. Please use yours.)
Anyway my friend is a terrible bowler. He can't break a 100. So on Monday during a nice conversation, I informed him of the fact that he was a terrible bowler. See in college we had this little group called The Monday Night Bowling Club, and if you could not break 100 you could not come back. It was serious, ask Beers, we never let her return. I simply told him that he would not be allowed at MNBC. Well, he said "Katie what denomination of church were you raised in." Methodist. And "you attended a religious college, what denomination was that college?" Methodist. And "while you were growing up, how often did your youth group bowl?" I don't remember. But "you went every Monday night in college?" Yes. Well there you have it, it has to do with denominations, Methodists are better bowlers. Side note - He is going to be a great lawyer, but I did not like this reasoning. So I said "What!?!" I proceed to tell him,that is a dumb way to look at the situation and to face it, he just isn't a good bowler. But no, he maintains that it has to do with denomination. So I ask, "well what are Presbyterians good at?" He responds "Talking shit." I got a good laugh out of this.
But he proceeds to say "seriously we spent our time going and singing Christmas Carols in nursing homes, Methodists take their youth bowling." I informed him that my Grandmother made me go and sing every month at the birthday party for the Wesley Manor Nursing home while I was in high school. (Yes, she knows I can't sing, but she said I was the best she could get.) Anyway, all week I have been pondering over whether he was right. Are Methodists just better bowlers?
I DO NOT like massages. Seriously, I read this Maxine cartoon once that summed it up "I would like massages if some stranger wasn't touching me the entire time." You are naked, nekked, exposed, and a stranger is touching you. Have you thought about it like that? I don't like for people I do not know to touch me in the first place, but to rub on me while I am under a blanket and naked? Really, how is this relaxing? And yes, I have had a massage, a very nice one at that. The lady was soo nice and completely professional, but it was weird nonetheless. Now, I know that a couple of people reading this blog are actually massage therapists. I apologize, but trust me my mother keeps the industry in business. And I know some of you are thinking,go see someone that you know personally, well come on thats kind a awkward as well. Hi, how are you today, so nice to see you again, now get naked and let me rub on you. No, thanks.
So the other thing that has been bugging me this week is a conversation I had with a friend about bowling. Last week was our law school bowling tournament. All law school tournaments, competitions etc., are taken very seriously. Very seriously. Just look at my picture on this blog, a group of us were the cast of the Price's Right for the Halloween Competition. I had my hair done at J.C. Penney's, one guy put on 22 coats of self tanner. Get what I am saying, these are competitive people here in lawyer school.
(Disclaimer - the rest of this blog is not meant to offend anyone. I personally believe God has a wonderful sense of humor. Please use yours.)
Anyway my friend is a terrible bowler. He can't break a 100. So on Monday during a nice conversation, I informed him of the fact that he was a terrible bowler. See in college we had this little group called The Monday Night Bowling Club, and if you could not break 100 you could not come back. It was serious, ask Beers, we never let her return. I simply told him that he would not be allowed at MNBC. Well, he said "Katie what denomination of church were you raised in." Methodist. And "you attended a religious college, what denomination was that college?" Methodist. And "while you were growing up, how often did your youth group bowl?" I don't remember. But "you went every Monday night in college?" Yes. Well there you have it, it has to do with denominations, Methodists are better bowlers. Side note - He is going to be a great lawyer, but I did not like this reasoning. So I said "What!?!" I proceed to tell him,that is a dumb way to look at the situation and to face it, he just isn't a good bowler. But no, he maintains that it has to do with denomination. So I ask, "well what are Presbyterians good at?" He responds "Talking shit." I got a good laugh out of this.
But he proceeds to say "seriously we spent our time going and singing Christmas Carols in nursing homes, Methodists take their youth bowling." I informed him that my Grandmother made me go and sing every month at the birthday party for the Wesley Manor Nursing home while I was in high school. (Yes, she knows I can't sing, but she said I was the best she could get.) Anyway, all week I have been pondering over whether he was right. Are Methodists just better bowlers?
Comments
(1) massages are awesome. YOU are just weird about people touching you. i mean, same thing as going to the doctor. you know... they have training just like doctors; they are trained to deal with your aches and pains.
(2) i did in fact go back to MNBC, and i would like to note that my inability to break 100 that night was due to my friend old forrester.
(3) i am methodist and we mainly just played capture the flag and went on scavenger hunts. no bowling involved - and yes, there is a bowling alley in selma. we just didn't go there. we sang at the nursing home too ;) maybe if my youth group had visited playland bowl more often i would have been more highly ranked in MNBC, peanut.
also, i'm methodist and a terrible bowler. i would never have been allowed at MNBC. i'm a much better bowler when i've been drinking and i'm not sure how that fits in well with youth group events.
(2) Apparently Baptists bowl too.
I enjoyed reading your blog, and I totally agree about massages--it must run in the family. By the way, I learned how to "blog" this week--what a terrible word!
Love you, Aunt Priscilla