Inquire Within

Can anyone out there explain how one person can have so much laundry to do? Today I have done four or five loads of laundry. IT IS just me living here folks, how is this possible? How can one person produce that many dirty clothes? I can't quite seem to figure it out.

And how in the world do I collect so much junk mail? I have this complex about throwing away credit card offers. I know it is dumb but Grandmother has convinced me that a bum is going to dig them out, somehow tape together the pieces of the offer, send it in and get a credit card in my name. On one hand I think, if anyone is willing to jump in the dumpster and take out my trash, clean it up, tape it up, and send it in, then maybe they should be rewarded. Okay, that is just my lazy side telling me to not take the time to find a shredder before throwing them away.

I once was on a date, that obviously wasn't going that great, and we started talking about credit card offerings. The guy told me that he rips up the stuff they mail and then puts it all in the envelope that they include and mails it back to them. That way the company pays for postage twice. The guy has a point, actually that was probably the only good point he had.

Speaking of awkward conversations on dates, I once had a date with this guy who told me the same three stories over and over. The waitress felt so bad for me she kept bringing me fresh drinks without me even really realizing it. Every time I looked down I had a fresh gin and tonic. Oh and to make matters worse a group of my friends happen to be at the same restaurant and I was facing them. They kept waving and laughing the entire time...I still haven't figured out how they knew we were going to that particular restaurant...

So, here is some advice: For all of you married folk that read this - please don't try and follow your friends on dates "to see how it is going." Do you want your single friends to come in your home and see how your marriage is going? Imagine me just hanging out on your couch saying "oh just act like I am not here, I am just seeing how things are going."

For all you single folk - I now have a list of conversation starters that keep the conversation rolling when you are on a date, that way you don't have to hear the same stories over and over. I call it "The Katie B Survival Guide to Conversation." I also use this when I am attending bridal/baby showers for said married folk above. I am thinking of marketing it.... For now just inquire within.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Professor Bradshaw, no matter which grammar camp you follow, the contraction for it is would be it's. Guess who?????
Katie B said…
I have no idea who wrote that comment, but I am laughing out loud. This is exactly why I should not be teaching!
Anna said…
if I had to guess, it was probably your mom...ha
Anonymous said…
Katie you need to invest in a shredder it is alot faster than tearing those credit card offers up and then having to mail them! I'm with Anna, has to be your mom!

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