Half-your-age
I rarely comment on current events/political news, however I feel the need to comment on the Roman Polanski case. If some of you haven't been watching the news, he fled the country 31-years ago before his sentencing hearing on a child-sex conviction. At the time he was a 43-year old man who had sex with a 13-year old girl.
There have been a multitude of celebrities that have commented that this was not "rape rape." And many people want him to be set free because he is a celebrity and has contributed so many wonderful things to the arts. I do not feel the need to comment on the legal aspects of the case because I have not read all the legal documents. Therefore, I have nothing to say about whether or not he should be released from prison, etc. I do want to comment on people who have this notion that a 43-year old man having sex with a 13-year old girl is "okay" and "not rape rape."
I can't seem to rectify how a 43-year old man, actually any adult age man or woman, should be having sex with any 13-year old. I would even argue this age could be extended as high as 18. I think back to my reasoning skills in junior high and high school, and quite frankly - I was just a dumb kid.
Someone told me last week about this formula called "half-your-age." Have you heard of this? Part of the formula is flawed, in my opinion, but the first part is very interesting and worth noting. It says: if you halve your years then add seven, you'll have the youngest decent age for a partner. Apparently the formula is a "creepiness of the age difference" detector. It is interesting how it progresses over time.
Take a 13 year old for example - according to the formula a (13/2 = 6.5 + 7 = 13.5) 13 year old needs to be "dating" other 13 year olds. If any of you can reflect back to those years, this seems pretty true. I mean who else would put up with a pimply emotional kid other than another pimply emotional kid...I am just saying. The formula is quite ingenious as to how it progress over time. Take an 18 year old, 18/2=9+7=16. Ah, you see how this formula changes, it seems to account for the changes in the emotional development of people. Interesting isn't it?
Let us take this a step further. Looking at my own age, 27/2=13.5+7=20.5, I could potentially date a 20.5 year old boy - but in my mind he would be just that, a boy. I even told my friend who told me this formula, "what would I do with a 20 year old boy?" It just seems a little too young for me. And what about someone who is say, 34, 34/2=17+7=24. See how the age range slowly gets wider as you get older? But back to the point, lets take a look at 43-year olds. 43/2=21.5+7=28.5. According to the formula - this entire Polanski situation would be deemed creepy.
Disclaimer - please do not think I am telling you that I totally believe in this formula and that if you aren't in this age range, then I think your relationship is creepy. No, that is not what I am saying. It was just an illustration.
What I am saying is, for me, there is something inherently wrong about a 43-year old with a 13-year old. Let us just say the kid consented or even wanted to have sex - any normal adult human being would or should, in my opinion, think that is wrong and on some level sick. In fact, I hope that Mr. Polanski is able to obtain some psychological help. But I am afraid that by celebrities saying, "she asked for it", or this was not "rape rape", or even condoning this situation, may keep other kids from coming forward about what is happening/or has happened to them. This frightens me. What if there is a kid at home watching TV and thinking that what is happening to them may be okay? It is not okay, and I sincerely hope and pray the media and these celebrities can eventually see that.
There have been a multitude of celebrities that have commented that this was not "rape rape." And many people want him to be set free because he is a celebrity and has contributed so many wonderful things to the arts. I do not feel the need to comment on the legal aspects of the case because I have not read all the legal documents. Therefore, I have nothing to say about whether or not he should be released from prison, etc. I do want to comment on people who have this notion that a 43-year old man having sex with a 13-year old girl is "okay" and "not rape rape."
I can't seem to rectify how a 43-year old man, actually any adult age man or woman, should be having sex with any 13-year old. I would even argue this age could be extended as high as 18. I think back to my reasoning skills in junior high and high school, and quite frankly - I was just a dumb kid.
Someone told me last week about this formula called "half-your-age." Have you heard of this? Part of the formula is flawed, in my opinion, but the first part is very interesting and worth noting. It says: if you halve your years then add seven, you'll have the youngest decent age for a partner. Apparently the formula is a "creepiness of the age difference" detector. It is interesting how it progresses over time.
Take a 13 year old for example - according to the formula a (13/2 = 6.5 + 7 = 13.5) 13 year old needs to be "dating" other 13 year olds. If any of you can reflect back to those years, this seems pretty true. I mean who else would put up with a pimply emotional kid other than another pimply emotional kid...I am just saying. The formula is quite ingenious as to how it progress over time. Take an 18 year old, 18/2=9+7=16. Ah, you see how this formula changes, it seems to account for the changes in the emotional development of people. Interesting isn't it?
Let us take this a step further. Looking at my own age, 27/2=13.5+7=20.5, I could potentially date a 20.5 year old boy - but in my mind he would be just that, a boy. I even told my friend who told me this formula, "what would I do with a 20 year old boy?" It just seems a little too young for me. And what about someone who is say, 34, 34/2=17+7=24. See how the age range slowly gets wider as you get older? But back to the point, lets take a look at 43-year olds. 43/2=21.5+7=28.5. According to the formula - this entire Polanski situation would be deemed creepy.
Disclaimer - please do not think I am telling you that I totally believe in this formula and that if you aren't in this age range, then I think your relationship is creepy. No, that is not what I am saying. It was just an illustration.
What I am saying is, for me, there is something inherently wrong about a 43-year old with a 13-year old. Let us just say the kid consented or even wanted to have sex - any normal adult human being would or should, in my opinion, think that is wrong and on some level sick. In fact, I hope that Mr. Polanski is able to obtain some psychological help. But I am afraid that by celebrities saying, "she asked for it", or this was not "rape rape", or even condoning this situation, may keep other kids from coming forward about what is happening/or has happened to them. This frightens me. What if there is a kid at home watching TV and thinking that what is happening to them may be okay? It is not okay, and I sincerely hope and pray the media and these celebrities can eventually see that.
Comments
Just as there is not "murder-murder", there is not "rape-rape".