I guess I need to write my name on my clothes tags....

Well, I am 32 years old and I am about to do one of the craziest things I have ever done. Okay, besides the whole quit my "job" to follow Jesus thing - which was, and still is, crazy. But, this summer I am going to work at a summer camp; i.e. tents, southern summer heat, canoes, a lake, and lots and lots of children. The thing is, while I have always loved camp movies - The Parent Trap (original), Indian Summer, Ernest Goes to Camp, Salute Your Shorts (Nickelodeon), Camp Nowhere, and Dirty Dancing (technically not a summer camp, I know) - I hated camp. Seriously, hated it.

The last time I went to camp I was thirteen. My parents kept reminding me of how much I disliked the experience the first time around, but I kept telling them I was only 10 at the time and was not ready. So, they let me go. By Tuesday I had convinced the counselors that I was sick and needed to go home - this was pre-cell-phone days. The counselors decided to call my parents, and I knew that I had a 50/50 shot of getting to leave that place. If my Dad answered the phone, I would be out of there in 8 hours. If Mom answered the phone, I was there until Sunday. When I heard the counselor say, "Mrs. Bradshaw," my heart sank. Mom said, "put her on the phone." They did, and she said, "what are your ailments?" I said, "well, my stomach is queasy." She said bluntly, "You hate it, but you wanted to go. Suck it up. We will see you on Sunday." I never signed up for another camp.

 

My parents cannot talk about this summer without laughing. Everyone keeps telling me their camp horror stories. One of my cousins went to a church camp which had convinced her that the world was not a place to live in, while preying upon their fear. She had been sent to this camp with several other children in her neighborhood. All the other children wrote home saying, "please come get me. This is awful." My cousin got swept up in the euphoria of the experience, and she begged not to leave. When my aunt arrived to take her home she kept saying, "don't take me out into that vile world." My aunt said, "get your ass in the car." It took her three or four days to get reacclimated to reality. Her husband said that all he learned to do at church camp was "french kiss." Incidentally, they have decided that their children will not be allowed to go to camp....

 

Here is the thing, these last two years have been wonderful, stressful, amazing, and challenging. As you already know, I spent my first year of seminary in New York City. I had some amazing experiences, not the least of which was karaoking in Korea Town. I made life long friends, learned from amazing professors, and went through liturgical boot camp. For certain reasons though, I transferred schools in order to spend my last two years of seminary in Tennessee. It was a bittersweet decision, but the right decision for me. Then, last summer I had to do a hospital chaplaincy. All I can say is that it was a really awesome experience that I never want to do again.

This past academic year was full of meeting new people, and finding my place amongst them. The second year of seminary is designed to tackle some very big theological ideas. Somewhere between justification, sanctification, soteriology, creation, and the various theological understandings of every sacrament, a person can loose sight of the awe and mystery of Christ. In fact, I think every seminarian goes through a period of cynicalism. On top of all our studies, we all had to do an internship at a local Episcopal church. I have been blessed to be at an incredible parish in Lookout Mountain, Tennessee. The parishioners have been so welcoming, and I have learned so much. One of the best things for me has been watching the children at the altar rail. It never fails that when my mind drifts into analyzing the theology of the liturgy and sacrament, the children's "awe" in taking the bread and wine reminds me of the great mystery of it all.

One of the other things that has happened at Sewanee has been the opportunity to engage in a "transforming congregations" education program. Through this program, I was inspired to write a proposal which was subsequently accepted for a conference at Harvard. If you are so inclined, you can read about it here. As a result, I had an opportunity to continue doing some advocacy work around these issues this summer. I prayed a lot about what to do, and, ultimately, I decided that at this point, I needed to have some fun and remember the awe and mystery of this life of faith in Christ. While I will continue to do work around issues of prisons and investing, for this moment, I need to focus on spirituality. So, to camp I go. I am hoping this summer will give me some time to catch up, albeit by phone, with some folks that I haven't had time to talk at length with in the last two years. I am also planning to blog this camp experience.

Oh, and for anyone who is interested - Siddalee has been staying with my parents. She is completely spoiled. Mom feeds her three times a day, and claims that she prefers bottled water. Dad loves it when Mom leaves because Sidda gives him all her attention. Frankly, I am not sure I will ever get her back....