Do We Deserve Forgiveness?
For the past several months I have been thinking a lot about forgiveness. As many of you know, I am a law clerk for a trial judge. We hear civil and criminal cases all day, every day. When people ask how I like my job, I can genuinely say that I find it very entertaining. Really, I am entertained by all the various different people that I come in contact with on a daily basis. Most of these people live in a world that I am so unfamiliar with, and it is such a learning experience. I feel like I am being prepared for something, I am just not certain what that is at this point.
I must say though, it is an interesting thing to work in the justice system. Whether it be civil cases or criminal cases, the parties involved are always seeking "to make someone pay", or "to make sure somebody gets what they deserve." The very definition of justice is “getting what you deserve.” So, for people to come to the justice system to get their pound of flesh, and to make sure someone gets what they deserve, makes complete sense.
Don't misunderstand me, I think the justice system is very important to our society, and when people do wrong I think they should have to pay their punishment. The thing is, during the last several months I have been wondering when forgiveness happens. I don't mean forgiveness through the justice system, I mean forgiveness on a personal and spiritual level. I see the beginning of the process and I would like to know, when do the victims or victims’ families forgive?
Jesus told us, "Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy." Matthew 5:7. What is mercy? Mercy is compassion that goes beyond justice. Do you get that? Jesus is calling us to live our lives with a compassion for others that goes beyond justice. So, our mercy upon people should go beyond making sure people get what they deserve. I don't think this means that we shouldn't punish people for crimes and wrongs done, I think this means that in our hearts and in our spiritual lives we should have a compassion that leads to forgiveness, mercy. That sounds really nice doesn't it? But do you all realize how hard that is?
Can you imagine having mercy that leads to forgiveness for someone who has killed your loved one? Can you imagine having mercy that leads to forgiveness for someone who has sexually abused you or your loved one? Can you imagine having mercy that leads to forgiveness for someone who has harmed, in anyway, you or someone you love?
Sometimes I sit and wonder how in the world these people will ever find a way to forgive the people who have done these things to them. What's worse is thinking about all of the wrongs done that never are turned in to the justice system, for whatever reason. I am sure there are many people out there who would love to have their pound of flesh through the justice system, but they know that will never happen. How do you have mercy when you know that justice was never done?I can't tell you how many times I have heard people say, "forgiveness is for you, not for the person who has done the wrong." That is so easy to say, easy to believe, but it doesn't make forgiveness easier.
Last week I had a discussion with someone about whether or not we ever deserve forgiveness. God is always ready to forgive when we ask, but we are not always ready to forgive others. Think about how many times you have said, "forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” We are forgiven as much as we forgive.
My hope is that our society doesn’t get so caught up in justice and setting things right that we forget about mercy. As I heard someone once say, “we can get too caught up in Nancy Grace, rather than Jesus’ grace.” I do not have the answer to all of these questions of justice and mercy, but I leave you with this scripture which has comforted me along the way: “Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.” (Colossians 3:13-14 - The Message).
I must say though, it is an interesting thing to work in the justice system. Whether it be civil cases or criminal cases, the parties involved are always seeking "to make someone pay", or "to make sure somebody gets what they deserve." The very definition of justice is “getting what you deserve.” So, for people to come to the justice system to get their pound of flesh, and to make sure someone gets what they deserve, makes complete sense.
Don't misunderstand me, I think the justice system is very important to our society, and when people do wrong I think they should have to pay their punishment. The thing is, during the last several months I have been wondering when forgiveness happens. I don't mean forgiveness through the justice system, I mean forgiveness on a personal and spiritual level. I see the beginning of the process and I would like to know, when do the victims or victims’ families forgive?
Jesus told us, "Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy." Matthew 5:7. What is mercy? Mercy is compassion that goes beyond justice. Do you get that? Jesus is calling us to live our lives with a compassion for others that goes beyond justice. So, our mercy upon people should go beyond making sure people get what they deserve. I don't think this means that we shouldn't punish people for crimes and wrongs done, I think this means that in our hearts and in our spiritual lives we should have a compassion that leads to forgiveness, mercy. That sounds really nice doesn't it? But do you all realize how hard that is?
Can you imagine having mercy that leads to forgiveness for someone who has killed your loved one? Can you imagine having mercy that leads to forgiveness for someone who has sexually abused you or your loved one? Can you imagine having mercy that leads to forgiveness for someone who has harmed, in anyway, you or someone you love?
Sometimes I sit and wonder how in the world these people will ever find a way to forgive the people who have done these things to them. What's worse is thinking about all of the wrongs done that never are turned in to the justice system, for whatever reason. I am sure there are many people out there who would love to have their pound of flesh through the justice system, but they know that will never happen. How do you have mercy when you know that justice was never done?I can't tell you how many times I have heard people say, "forgiveness is for you, not for the person who has done the wrong." That is so easy to say, easy to believe, but it doesn't make forgiveness easier.
Last week I had a discussion with someone about whether or not we ever deserve forgiveness. God is always ready to forgive when we ask, but we are not always ready to forgive others. Think about how many times you have said, "forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” We are forgiven as much as we forgive.
My hope is that our society doesn’t get so caught up in justice and setting things right that we forget about mercy. As I heard someone once say, “we can get too caught up in Nancy Grace, rather than Jesus’ grace.” I do not have the answer to all of these questions of justice and mercy, but I leave you with this scripture which has comforted me along the way: “Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.” (Colossians 3:13-14 - The Message).
Comments
ALL of our actions have consequences, that is the justice part; whether we are judged now or later. When we forgive God gives us the gift of freeedom from the bitterness & anger that can & will destroy our lives ~~~ that is a choice WE make & our consequence. Love you OM